I wake up, and as my day starts, so
too do my first sensations and thoughts. Next come my plans — things
to do, intentions for the day.
But, something else comes too; a pressure I know only
too well. It may come as a voice inside or a sensation
in the solar plexus, or a pressure in my forehead or a
familiar heaviness on my shoulders. Behind each of these
responses, lies the question: “Will I make it?”
The pressure arises not only because of the number of
things I need to do or from the feeling that there never
seems to be enough time to do all of it, but mostly, from
a vague, even unconscious feeling that to do it all will
take effort.
How have stress and pressure become such constant
companions in my life? When did I start running, having
no time for myself, feeling distant from people and preoccupied?
When did that happen? Is this what life is all about? I
feel uncertain, afraid of failure and, more than that,
I expect and
in fact take for granted, a level of stress in merely getting
through my day.
The pressure is instant and, without realising it, I am “in
the dock” and have started to assess and judge myself.
I am
measuring my worth — as man, woman, husband or wife,
father or mother, son or daughter, worker or boss...
Pay enough attention to your inner voices and you’ll
notice
that from the moment you wake up there is no respite from
this feeling. There may be temporary relief when you have
accomplished a task... but soon, the pressure returns. |
